March 1994 Is It Simply Culture or Religion?

By Meriem Djafi

My husband and I arrive at the mosque through the back door as I walk around to the front entrance However, when I arrive at the front door, I usually have to knock and wait patiently because the door is locked. As I stand in the cold, I feel isolated and locked out. What should I do? Is it acceptable for me to go around to the back door to enter the mosque or should I continue to knock and wait? I wait because I know that no Muslim can be denied the right to enter a mosque and offer prayers therein. After a few minutes or so, a sister answers the door, and I enter the mosque to pray. I remove my shoes as I prepare to enter the room for prayer.

Can you imagine what I find? Many women are sitting in several groups talking in numerous languages, children are running around as they scream and play, sisters and children alike are eating and gossiping instead of preparing for prayer, and I almost always find a cockroach crawling on the floor or walls. This is not what I expect to find when I enter a room for prayer. In addition to this, I always find women the bent, broken metal blinds the bent, broken metal blinds peeking at the men.

This is really bizarre to me, and I have much difficulty comprehending this whole situation. Aisha said, The Messenger of Allah, PBUH, ordered the building of the mosque and that it should be kept clean and perfumed (AD-Msh.4:7). Is it not the responsibility of all brothers, sisters, and their children to show the utmost RESPECT for the mosque since "the mosques are Allah's" (72:18)? We all need to work together to correct this!

The imam turns on the microphone and makes the athan, the noise and utter chaos continues even though Salman said on the authority of the Prophet, PBUH, "one should remain silent when the imam speaks" (Bukhari, 11:35). During, the prayer, the sisters are silent even though the children continue to yell, scream, cry, and run between the lines. Unfortunately, some of the sisters make as much noise as the children when the imam gives his lecture, whether in English or Arabic.

This is so frustrating because I come to the mosque to worship Allah, pray, and learn Qu'ran. After all, the mosque, being the essential meeting place of Muslims five times a day, is also a general center where all important matters relating to the welfare of the Muslim community are transacted and where Muslims gathered together on all important occasions. What can I do? I ask a sister to please be quiet or stop the children from running through the doors to the men's side, but some sisters seem to be offended.

I am comforted to know that at least my husband can concentrate on his prayer in peace because he is not stranded on the noisy, dirty, "baby-sitting" side of the mosque. Why am I not permitted to join the men in prayer and accomplish my objective for coming to the mosque?

I am convinced that separating the men from the women is cultural. As long as men and women are dressed appropriately, then why can they not pray together in congregation. Ibn 'Umar said, A wife of 'Umar used to attend the morning and 'Isha prayers In congregation in the mosque. It was said to her, why do you go forth and you know that 'Umar does not like this and is adverse to it? She said, what prevents him from prohibiting me? He said, what prevents him is the saying of the Messenger of Allah, PBUH: "Do not prohibit the handmaids of Allah from attending the mosques of Allah" (Bukhari 11:12)

In a sense, I feel like I am prohibited from attending the mosque. My husband encourages me to attend the mosque as much as I desire to go. However, when I attend the mosque, I usually leave frustrated and unfulfilled. Why should I drive a long distance to the mosque and leave my clean, 'peaceful home Perhaps, I want to pray with my brothers and sisters in order to learn more about my religion. I believe that Muslims' iman decreases when an individual practices his/her religion alone; while on the other hand, a Muslim's iman can only strengthen and increase in congregation.

What is our solution? As an ummah, we must correct this situation because no one has the right to interfere with another brother's or sister's prayer or opportunity to learn• more about Islam. I am not going to stop coming to the mosque. I am going to persevere and continue to be patient. It is our obligation to educate our fellow brothers and sisters in a polite manner. One day, I am sure that I will go through the double doors that separate the men from the women and pray behind the men as I did in the mosques in Canada. I do not wish to offend any of the brothers, but I have come to the mosque to pray and hear Qu'ran. Our religion does not prohibit us from praying together. Abu Musa said, the Messenger of Allah, PBUH, said: "When you pray, set right your ranks; then one of you should act as your imam, so when he says takbir, say the takbir, and when he says ghairi-l-rnagh-dzub-i 'alia-him wa la-dzal-lin, say amin, Allah will accept your prayer (M, Msh 4: 12).

Honestly, I want to stop the ritual of constantly complaining to my husband when I join him once again as we leave the mosque. He always finds himself in the situation of having to repeat the lecture that the imam gave so that I can learn. If the doors that separate the men from the women are to remain, let them separate the people that want to worship from those who want to socialize, gossip and eat.